We in the Ochwat clan are still reeling from news of a Pokémon character that practically has our name. His name is actually Oshawott, but as you can see from this parade of ineptitude, our name gets misspelled all the freakin’ time. So the fact that Pokemon gets four out of six letters correct and in order is good enough for us.
The other day on the blog we had our first encounter with the little sea-ottery thing, which was a bit rocky (e.g., “like a depressed love child of a panda and an otter, cursed to wear a frilled sweater containing an extremely unfortunate illustration of a penis”).
But we’re slowly warming to the mercurial marine mammal in the teal jumper. I even bought a package of Pokémon cards, even though I’m sure Nintendo will reimburse me once we become spokesmen for Oshawott. That’s a bad photo of the card, below:
Oddly, his keratin weapon-thingey is flipped over on the card (Is it reversible?). Also, he’s looking kind of badass…ish. I mean, relative to being a sea otter in a sweater, right?
My younger son saw the card and said he liked the “croissant” thing he has. And if you flip the beige thing over and you can shake off all the Freud the first image brings to mind, you can see his point.
Especially when the “croissant” super-heats in the oven, and then you throw it. Get a mouthful of this buttery goodness, bad guys!
Someone commented on the last blog post, “I don’t [know] you and you don’t know me, but after reading this, I feel sorry for your family to have a similar name to a Pokemon. Hope this doesn’t affect you very much.”
But that ain’t it. The name’s hard enough all by itself, so Oshawott makes things better. My older son called him “The Polish Pokémon.” He’s got the right idea. Besides, Oshawott can do this:
Did you know Oshawotts could mentalize like whoa? I’ve got to learn that trick. Maybe it involves more coffee.