Traffic Rant

<rant>I was driving down a street — a bigger street than the side street, where someone in a green car was waiting to enter. The car in front of me slowed, stopped — then gestured to the green car on the side street to turn left.

The car crept forward, cautiously, since it was two lanes each way … and, of course, some of the cars in my lane (the right) changed to the left and sped up to make the light … just as the green car vertured out further.

The motorist who decided to stop all six of us to give right-of-way to the green car tried to direct traffic, by looking in her rear-view mirror and transmitting a go/no go signal with hand gestures.

Somehow, despite all this, the green car got across without getting blindsided as it crossed.

But … can we talk a minute about how f**ked up that was? The idiot in front of me decided to ignore traffic laws, which are based on years of data and implemented by traffic engineers, just to give someone else a turn–thus ignoring the six people behind her.

Is it kind? No, letting that person in inconveniences and endangers about 12 other people, including the person she’s letting in. Does it speed things up? No, not if everyone has to stop, change lanes, inch out, narrowly avoid collisions, miss green lights, etc. In fact, it’s worse for everyone involved.
Sigh. You can get a ticket for the most trivial traffic offense, but how much would I like to see one issued for such a boneheaded maneuver as that. </endrant>

How Do You Spell That?

O-C-H-W-A-T Only six letters. How hard can six letters be?

Pretty damn hard, apparently. For the past few years I’ve been collecting various lame attempts to spell my name. And there’s just enough low-grade interest that I thought I’d post it again.

I know it’s only six letters, but some of these aren’t even close. To paraphrase Crash Davis in the movie Bull Durham, you wonder if some of these people could hit water if they fell out of a boat.

So here they are, grouped by ineptitude:

Inexplicable: Correctly spelled “Ochwat,” misspelled “John”

• Judd Ochwat
• Jogn Ochwat
• James Ochwat

Dead on Arrival (Hint: It starts with “O”)

• John Achwat
• John Auquat
• John Aquad
• John Ahwat
• John Dehwat
• John Schwat (for some reason I sort of like this one)

What part of “O-C” don’t you understand?

• John Orhwat
• John Owchat
• John Oshwat
• John Okward
• John Oschwat
• John Ouhwat
• John Oschwatch (he knows what time it is!)
• John Onchwat (this from a payroll check, believe it or not)

“It’s O, C, H …”

• John Ocawat

“Let me start again. O, C, H, W …”

• John Ochnat
• John Ochuuat (Hint: “w” does not equal double-u)
• John Ochurs

Getting Warmer

• John Ochwuat
• John Ochwot
• John Ochwdt (Buy me a vowel)
• John Ochwalt
• John Ochwant
• John Ochwart (This in 72-point type on a tabletop sign at a recent training class. Thanks, SQLSoft!)

So Close, and yet so far!

• John Ochwag
• John Ochwal
• John Ochwa
• John Ochwai

Special Bonus Letters!

• John Ochwatt
• John Ochwatte
• John Ochwhtat

And Finally: You Go, Girlfriend!

• Ms. John Ochwat

Of Worms and Smoking Cows

It’s not as if I don’t have too much to do already, but every so often I read stuff that’s just crying out to be blogged. Case in point is a story on AP yesterday, “Calif. encourages bringing worms to work.”

In case you’re not hell-bent to read said article, a quote: “Always on the cutting edge of all things environmental, California is encouraging public and private-sector employees to bring worms to work so that the creatures can chew up apple cores, sandwich scraps and other lunch leftovers and produce compost.”

Is it a good idea? Sure, why not? It’s composting in action. But what makes the story a worthy read is the enterprising reporter, who didn’t just phone it in:

“Over time, the caretakers have learned a thing or two about the worms’ preferences.

“Worms don’t like ranch dressing,” Hurst said.

They also seem to harbor a special dislike for bologna sandwiches, though any kind of dairy or meat product is problematic because of the smell, he added. Like other slender creatures, worms are also finicky about fatty foods and carbs, and eat bread only in moderation. Coffee grounds, on the other hand, and rotting fruit go over very well.”

In unrelated animal news: As predicted in a New York Times op-ed piece a solid 20 days before it happened, the E. Coli outbreak in U.S. spinach was traced to cow manure.

An AP story today includes a quote by Dr. Kevin Reilly, deputy director of the Prevention Services Division at the California Department of Health (smell a copy & paste there?).

“We continue to try to determine the connection between this finding and how the spinach on the field might have been contaminated,” Reilly said. “We do not have a smoking cow at this point now.”

I, for one, am eagerly awaiting news of the smoking cow.

 

 

 

That “New Car Smell” Can Make You Sick

Stumbled across this while researching zero-VOC paint:

“Many vehicle buyers take delight in the distinctive ‘new car smell’ of their purchase, but chemical emissions from interior plastics and other parts that contribute to the familiar odor may actually be bad for their health.

V.O.C.’s, or volatile organic compounds, are found in paints and in glues and sealants used in auto interiors. In a closed car — especially on a hot day — concentrated V.O.C. emissions from seats and dashboards may be hazardous, according to recent studies. Other interior chemicals under suspicion include phthalates, a softener in plastic, and polybrominated diphenyl ethers, or PBDE’s, a flame retardant.”

Why, oh why, did I sell my 1985 Toyota Tercel?